The Only Approval You Need is Your Own Journey to Self-Validation
- Aleksandar Tosevski

- 1 hour ago
- 3 min read
The world constantly shifts its standards and expectations. What was praised yesterday might be overlooked today. When you chase approval from others, you tie your sense of worth to something unstable and external. This leaves you feeling insecure, no matter how much you achieve. Instead, proving yourself to yourself builds a foundation of strength and clarity that no outside opinion can shake.
Why Chasing External Validation Keeps You Insecure
Seeking approval from others means you depend on their changing opinions. This creates a cycle where:
You adjust your actions to fit others’ expectations.
Your confidence fluctuates based on praise or criticism.
You lose sight of your own values and goals.
For example, imagine someone who constantly posts achievements on social media hoping for likes and comments. Even with many likes, they may still feel empty or anxious because their self-worth depends on others’ reactions. This insecurity persists because external validation is temporary and unpredictable.
How Self-Validation Builds Inner Strength
When you focus on proving yourself to yourself, your motivation comes from within. This shift leads to:
Clearer goals based on your values.
Consistent progress regardless of outside opinions.
A stronger sense of pride in your achievements.
Consider an athlete who trains daily to improve personal bests rather than to win medals or applause. Their satisfaction comes from knowing they gave their best effort and grew stronger. This internal drive creates lasting confidence and resilience.
Stop Competing with People Who Don’t Matter
When you seek approval from others, you often compare yourself to people who don’t influence your life positively. This comparison can cause:
Unnecessary stress and self-doubt.
Distraction from your own path.
Feeling like you’re never enough.
By focusing on your own journey, you stop competing with irrelevant standards. Instead, you measure success by your own progress and values. This frees you from the pressure of fitting into someone else’s mold.
Why Your Wins Feel Different When Earned for Your Own Pride
Achievements feel more meaningful when they come from self-driven effort. This happens because:
You recognize the hard work behind your success.
Your pride is genuine, not dependent on others’ approval.
You build confidence that lasts beyond the moment.
For example, finishing a challenging project because you wanted to learn and grow feels more rewarding than doing it just to impress a boss or colleague. This kind of win strengthens your belief in yourself.

Practical Steps to Prove Yourself to Yourself
Building self-validation takes practice. Here are some ways to start:
Set personal goals that reflect your values, not others’ expectations.
Track your progress regularly to see how far you’ve come.
Celebrate small wins to build momentum and confidence.
Reflect on your motivations before making decisions.
Limit time spent on social media or environments that trigger comparison.
Practice self-compassion when you face setbacks.
For instance, journaling about your daily achievements and feelings can help you stay connected to your own growth instead of external praise.
The Person You Must Impress is the One You’re Becoming
Your journey is about becoming a stronger, clearer version of yourself. This means:
Focusing on growth rather than perfection.
Accepting that your path is unique.
Embracing challenges as opportunities to learn.
When you shift your focus inward, you build a foundation that no external change can shake. Your self-worth becomes stable and independent.



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